Crossing that line..

I know I said let's take things slow and see where it goes..But i swear I never expected you to take that this literally.. That's what I get for being cautious.. =P

It's frustratingly confusing how you say things that make my heart skip a beat but yet deflect and block almost any and every move I try..

With Pri there was warning bells throughout the whole experience but surprisingly with you I don't hear them..Makes me feel even more so that you just may be worth it..

Can't find a word for my current mood. Pretty sure im slightly hungover but doesn't feel that way.. No headaches and I don't feel like throwing up.. Not tired or sleepy but extremely lethargic..

Meh (as you always say)... I'll wait and see...

Later day's ya'll..

Current beat: Girl on TV - LFO

come on...

I swear Tom Cruise deserves a medal just for prolonging this character. I applauded and loved his cameos in tropic thunder as les grossman but his performance at the MTV movie awards just takes the cake. A medal or an award!! You read it here first!!

a moment of clarity??

KS: How u otherwise???

Me: I'm a mess but I'll get through it. Life keeps throwing more important things at me so i cant concentrate on myself which is good. I got thesis, then job applications, then visa and then getting an apartment.

If i don't get a job then I'm going home for good and then the job and apartment process starts all over again. So i assume late September is prob when I'm free enough to actually sort my head and heart out. So yeah. That's a long way to go so I'm not gonna think about it until then.

But then again starting a new job can be stressful so maybe it'll take me like three or four months to adjust. So next January I'll work on myself. Heck i'll make it part of my new years resolution.


Hmmmm..........interesting no??

Laters ya'll

Stalker much??

*This after I pointed out some minor details in a vid Florence made for her friends...

Florence: Wow, you'll make a good stalker you know...

Me: haha..nth more flattering den getting told i have a future in creepy

Tis true!! =P

Now I may not be the worst or the best but you gotta respect my honesty

Is it not sad that pockets of the majority believe that rebounding is the best way to get over breakup?

I personally know many people who think rebound or rebounds is ace to getting over being dumped or generally getting over someone and that's quite sad.

I believe that we should have the strength and self respect to heal on our own and not depend/need someone else to make us feel better. I mean what happened to the whole 'you cant love another if you don't love yourself' concept?

That's what I believe but I know otherwise. Sadly enough I've rebounded and yes it helped and made me feel whole loads better. Accept when she realized it was a rebound and pulled the plug. I seriously felt like shit for leading her on and hurting her. What's worse we couldn't even remain friends after (duh!!). Hence the negativity towards rebounding.

I'm going to stick to my current plan. Going out, partying with friends, drinking quite a bit and meeting new people. I already know I deserve better and that it was her lost. I just gotta believe it and I hope I am on the right track.

Now I may not be the worst or the best but you gotta respect my honesty.
And I may break your heart, but I don't really think there's anybody's as bomb as me
So you can take this chance, in the end everybody's gonna be wondering how ya deal
You might say this is Ludacris, but Taio Cruz tell em' how ya feel!


Listen, now I'm only gonna break your heart
And shatter and spatter it all into little itty bitty pieces
Whether or not you get it all together
Then its finders keepers and losers weepers
See I'm not trying lead you on, no I'm only trying keep it real
You might say this is Ludacris, but Taio Cruz tell her how you feel!

Laters ya'll

Current Beat: Jason Derulo - Riding Solo (HAH!!)

Quote of the day:

T: My friend told me today she broke a bench. I mean I've heard of people breaking beds but never a bench.

Me: *raised eyebrows..broke how?

T: You're smart. I'm sure you already know.

Me: Niceeeeee

*Anybody notice how my quotes have become snippets of conversations...hmmmmm =P

Oh that nostalgic feeling...

Ain't it funny how all it takes is one compliment to make your day. Maybe it is because I find her amazingly attractive. Not just looks wise but she's got a real unique personality which I really dig. Yes I am going with dig. Maybe it is because she's not my usual type. Maybe it is because I've always kinda had this lil crush on her since back in the day.

*On another note, isn't it weird how young people like me actually try to use that phrase. 'Back in the day.' Back in my day would actually be referring to my young teenage days. Not much impact there eh..

I suddenly had a Beatles moment today. Remembered back when my mum had control of the car radio and would play either the Beatles, ABBA or Kenny Rogers. I d/l two of my fav songs. 'Hey jude and when I saw her standing there. There's nothing like flashes from your childhood to help with thesis completion stress. It's on repeat now. =)

Met up with HS before coffee with Rae n Navin. She's got a big decision coming over the horizon. Two boys - always a tricky situation, laced with minefields. I remember when I had to make a choice similar to that. I particulary remember feeling it was like the biggest decision I ever had to make. Boy was i VERY wong and EXTREMELY naive back then.

Remembering past encounters, choices and so on can be quite fun. A good nostalgic session can sometimes, on extremely rare occasions, be a helthy replacement to getting high. One can see where you've been or how far you've come. But as always good things must have its limits. Too much of a good thing and all that jazz. Because in the end, you're in the here and now and should always concentrate on that. Too much and you'll end up reaching a 'what if?' Never consider a 'what if?' i say. Not that i've taken my own advice but based on those personal experiences, one should really stay clear of those kinda day dreams.

Anyways I'm off. I got an early start tomorrow for football and I gotta finish my OrgComm assignment by tomorrow night. I forsee a long tiring day.

Laters..

Current Beat: The Isley Brothers - Shout (Mater Music Remix)

Quote of the day: *Me teasing Axy about Australia loosing to the US in a friendly football match

ME: Ouch! Maybe you SHOULD opt for England this year eh?

AXY: I don't see Malaysia in the wc buddy.

hmmmmm

According to daddy, thats the car he's gonna get...

The Audi Q7...

I'll believe it when I see it...

Later days ya'll

I could really use a wish right now wish right now...

This is a mistake

Ok! Yes it’s a mistake. I know it’s a mistake but there are certain things in life where you know that it’s a mistake but you don’t really know it’s a mistake. Because the only way to really know it’s a mistake is to make the mistake and look back and say ‘yep that was a mistake.’ So really the bigger mistake would be to not make the mistake because then you’d go your whole life not really knowing if something mistake or not. Does any of this make sense to you?

I don’t know. You said mistake a lot….

"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now wish right now wish right now
Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now wish right now wish right now"

LOL!!

There are times, even those you spend celebrating success of your favorite team, when you just gotta laugh at something funny.

I support Man Utd but heck there is no way anyone cannot think they're kissing.

Enjoy!!

Later days..

Funny!!

Cos I got time while she got freedom

"Breakeven"
by The Script

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just prayin' to a god that I don't believe in
Cos I got time while she got freedom
Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break even

Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man that's gonna put her first
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping
Cos when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven... even... no

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you,
And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up that you're ok
I'm falling to pieces, yeah,
I'm falling to pieces

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
Cos she's moved on while I'm still grieving
And when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven even... no

What am I gonna to do when the best part of me was always you,
And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up that you're ok
I'm falling to pieces, yeah,
I'm falling to pieces, yeah,
I'm falling to pieces
(One still in love while the other ones leaving)
I'm falling to pieces
(Cos when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven)

Oh you got his heart and my heart and none of the pain
You took your suitcase, I took the blame.
Now I'm try'na make sense of what little remains ooh
Cos you left me with no love and no love to my name.

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just prayin' to a god that I don't believe in
Cos I got time while she got freedom
Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break
No it don't break
No it don't break even no

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you and
What am I suppose to say when I'm all choked up that you're ok
(Oh glad your okay now)
I'm falling to pieces yeah
(Oh I'm glad your okay)
I'm falling to pieces yeah
(One still in love while the other ones leaving)
I'm falling to pieces
(Cos when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven)

Oh it don't break even no
Oh it don't break even no
Oh it don't break even no

ah yes....

Let us all take a moment to pause and drooool over this........

ah yes

Emma Watson

enjoy!!

Think again??

Was walking home from the gym the other day and this really made me laugh. It was on a bus stop. One's gotta love the cynicism...


Word of the day: popinjay - a vain a talkative person *[I gotta say this made my day!! =)]

Current beat: Flight of the Conchords - Most beautiful girl in the room

Later days ya'll

hopefully this is it...

I'm not overreacting am i??

I mean it's considered rock bottom once i am drinking beer and listening to Lionel Ritchie, Diana Ross n Alias right??

Please somebody tell me there isn't anything lower then this coz quite frankly I am quite the tired off all this.

frontdoorcayman.com

Happy St Patrick's Day everybody. Hope you've had a good one..

Laters

In midst of agitation & frustration I grasp for some clarity

Im gonna try something new. Everyday I meet or am around so many interesting. Im sure I can find something interesting that is said or catches my fancy. So Im going to include my favorite quote of the day. Also gonna add what im listening to at that point. Just to make things more interesting. Hope nothing embarassing comes out.

Went to scout new gloves n knee guards today. My gloves are over 2 years old n I think its about time I stop using training gloves. N since im playing in a futsal leauge now I should get knee guards because I can't continue treating my knees this way. Bruised and scraped every Wed. So anyways saw this Nike gloves for 30Aud and found simple pair of knee guards for 20Aud. Hopefully everything works out.

Going out tonight. Ko's b'day dinner at her place. Aound 10 something I'll take my leave and join Rae n others at Long Room. Kim's b'day bash. Haven't been to Long Room in ages so should be fun. M semi formal-in it up to prove excitement. Ko's place is good food and good people, but I heard we're drinking and she'll be there. I just hope I dont let my own demons make it more awkward then it has to be.

Tmr i got RMIT tryouts and Lenny's 21st on the agenda. Night i suggested to her we do dinner then lost n GG marathon but she's not confirmed it so yea. *Twist twist twist.

Im wondering, since Im back to bloging, if i should pimp up my blog. Only thing is that I find HTML a bitch. yes i know many ppl have mastered it but I haven't so moving on..... Maybe i'll just randomly seek a cool template online and see what i find.

Not ashamed to admit Im happy GG is back. Blake Lively looked awesomely hot in everything she wore this week. Not to be outdone, J-Lo looked bootylicious as ever in this weeks How I Met Your Mother (HIMYM).

Movies i really wanna watch are Invictus, The Blind Side n Brothers. Prob download Invictus coz its already out of the cinema but Brothers is coming soon to Nova. Really wanna see The Blind Side but its only showing at Hoyts and I cant afford watching a movie for 17Aud right now.

Last night Hanna n I walked to Carlton Gardens and spent an hour laying down on a grassy hill in the middle of the playground talking about anything to everything. It felt really relaxing. We only left because the possoms were getting closer and it became really chilly.

Quote of the day: "Its just scary how understanding you are. I don't know if thats bad or good."

Current beat: Duffy - Mercy

Laters

I need a little good luck to get me by this time

"Tongue Tied"

by Faber Drive

Bright cold silver moon
Tonight alone in my room
You were here just yesterday
Slight turn of the head
Eyes down when you said
I guess I need my life to change
Seems like something's just aren't the same
What could I say?

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time that I try I get tongue tied
I'll need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I stare up at the stars
I wonder just where you are
You feel a million miles away
Was it something I said?
Or something I never did?
Or was I always in the way?
Could someone tell me what to say to just make you stay?

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I know it feels like the end
Don't want to be here again
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
What it takes I don't care
We're gonna make it I swear
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I know it feels like the end
Don't want to be here again
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
What it takes I don't care
We're gonna make it I swear
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again

Dancing forever...

We tried this dance once. Falling over each others feet, missing each step, defying the beat. But you seem so much more in tune to the underlying harmony my heart plays when you kiss my nose.

Music notes tremble when we are close together. My hand in yours, twirling you around this glossy floor. The only eyes on us are those of the evening stars.

Time has molded us into the best of our kind. Swiftly moving like bolts of lightning through a hailstorm. Powerful, dangerous and oh so beautiful.

Let us hold hands and destroy worlds of silent steps. Just me tied to you...for eternity.

9 deadly words used by a woman

found this on facebook and thought it was quite funny...not entirely always true but s'times yeaaa.. =)

9 Deadly words used by a woman

1) Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4) Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

5) Loud Sigh
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot
and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6) That’s Okay
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before
deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) Thanks
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . that will bring on a ‘whatever’).

8 ) Whatever
Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!

9) Don’t worry about it, I got it
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3

later days ya'll!

Shrek Forever After

A bored and domesticated Shrek pacts with deal-maker Rumpelstiltskin to get back to feeling like a real ogre again, but when he's duped and sent to a twisted version of Far Far Away -- where Rumpelstiltskin is king, ogres are hunted, and he and Fiona have never met -- he sets out to restore his world and reclaim his true love. (IMDB.com)

Out June 2010 ya'll!!

Bad Romance

I'm an idiot. I know how it should be. I know what needs to be done. Yet here i am. Not letting this open wound heal. Somebody bring on the handcuffs. Its my own hand twisting the knife.

This feeling is like a drug. Everybody to anybody can tell me it is not good for me but yet I'm still additively taking it in. Its funny how right Will Smith was when he said "there ain't no pain like from the opposite sex." Yes that's my cool celebrity quote. Big Willie style!!

Because to not feel this pain is to not have her. What i have now is not complete but its better than nothing. Its this acknowledgment that makes me choose my current predicament. I've always been a big believer in not whining about things you've brought on to yourself so yea.

Meh...

You know that I want you
And you know that I need you
I want it bad, your bad romance

I want your love and
I want your revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
I want your love and
All your lovers' revenge
You and me could write a bad romance

I believe!!

Now I'm not completely naive. I'm not saying that the articles are the main reason for sales. All I'm trying to put out there is that this particular magazine does have some rather good articles.

There i said it.

peace out

Letter to Mr Brightside

Dear Mr Brightside,

Its been almost four years since we last crossed paths. And boy did you leave a lasting impression. Now it meet again and it makes me sad, knowing that after four years some things haven't changed. Yes I am older. I am wiser (albeit only slightly and my recent actions say otherwise).

What matters however is not what has changed but what has not. I find myself in that dark place once again. The place I swore never to return to again but yet here we are. And like before I know what needs to be done. I know how to ease the pain. How to lessen the ache. And also like before I find myself not taking my own advice but doing the total opposite.

Now don't get me wrong. I do not blame or hate you for what has happened. How could I? Yours is a tale of wrong place wrong time. I just resent that you were present for two of the most vulnerable moments of my life.

And if it makes you feel any better, there has been once significant change. The last time, I heard you once then never again. This time however I find myself constantly seeking your solace. Guess there's hope for me yet.

Yours truly,

Me.

I'm coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head
But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, letting me go

And I just can’t look - it's killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Turning through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside

Only him laa...

"Put it this way.. What if this all just a cruel way to make you realise you're gay? By which terms i'd still be entitled to say I love you. =)"

How to not love that Indon boy... haha!!

laters ya'll